Wishfull thinking...

Talking with my brother has always made me get in a good mood. I guess he is the only one who can cheer me up even when nobody else can. He makes me believe in myself without any condescending blaber. And sometimes that is all i need...or a kiss and a hug, and the confidence that everything is going to be allright. And despite everything surrounding me is falling apart, making it damn hard to stand straight, i do believe that everything will be allright, deep down i guess i allways thought that almost everything has a solution.
I keep wishing for a change, something that makes sense to me...even if i don't know what it is. I keep thinking about going away, the fear isn't as present as it was due to hard experiences, my only concern are my parents...i feel like i can do anything, but i'm not given the chance, even when i look for it and have work hard all these years to get it. I still haven't got anything of my own...except me....and the road up ahead is unknowned and, i believe, with too many curves all together, after all it has been like that all the way this far...why would it get easier now? But if i have make it so far, i know i will make it in the future. It's just that i'm so tired, i just want to close my eyes, and sleep, or dream, anything that prevents me from waking up to yet another battle...But i know i will wake up and i will fight and everything is going to work out fine, just wishing it would be a little bit easier this time.

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